Dr. Vernal's Diary

You know those sunday mornings where you wake up with such a hang-over that being tortured by Kim Jong-Il and his 40 korean sex slaves, while listening to David Hasselhoff's greatest hits doesn't sound so bad after all? Now, Imagine going to a baby shower on that same day. That was the nightmare I woke up to that morning. When I opened my eyes I had a headache like someone had been bashing my head with a frying pan all night. a face that looked somewhat similar to that, and...

It was easter and Bryan and I had decided to go visit our friend Orla for a week of hardcore partying. Some choose to fast, but due to our lack of morals we decided to take this opportunity to replace our blood with alcohol. When we arrived at the airport, Orla had for whatever reason chosen to dress up as a Bavarian Yodeler in order to cause us as much embarrassment as possible. Orla is the kind of person who will go through great measures to embarrass his friends, and he never fails to suc...

It wasn't the first time I had been groped in public, but it was however the first time I'd been raped....By a bicycle. I was walking down the street wondering if germany was an animal which one it would be. Then it hit me... from behind, pushed me to the ground and planted itself right on top of me. I quickly realized that I had either been in an accident or was being raped by an alien wearing rubber gloves. Unfortunately it was the first mentioned. I quickly got back on my feet and thought...